Dear Abby: Have Mercy

There’s a woman in Chicago who’s making us look bad.

After hundreds of national media stories about how we’ve held up under lake effect and Nor’easter snow, it seemed the people of CNY could do no wrong. The hardy pioneer spirit that’s kept us alive on the frozen tundra has been celebrated everywhere.

Now, comes this:

dearabby.jpeg Dear Abby,

My brother has 15 children by eight mothers. Five are with his wife, from whom he has been separated for 16 years…

I feel their marriage is long over… how can I tell her to move on with her life without sounding like a broken record?

Braveheart in Syracuse, N.Y.

Latest heir to the name of Abigail Van Buren, how could you do this to us? By printing that signature on one letter in today’s advice column, you’ve kicked us back into trailer trash territory. You’ve degraded us from determined survivors of nature’s fury, to seedy denizens of “Ozarks North.”

It would take another 100 inches of snow to lift us back up where we belong. And right now, this winter, do you know anybody who wants that?

Dear Abby, we just hope you’re proud of yourself. And about that hair…

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